Like a Diary Entry Maybe?

I have a single set of oracle cards that I like to pull from occasionally when my spirit feels so inclined. After watching quite the documentary (Shouting Down Midnight), which resonated loudly through my body and soul, I pulled a card that asked me to pursue some kind of creative endeavor. This is the first thing that I thought about... so, here I am, writing a blog about I don't know, for the purpose of I don't know, about me who really... I don't know. 


Maybe this will be a blog about finally addressing the pain that remains from my abortion nearly 10 years ago. I tend to think of this event as the catalyst of a lot of unhappiness, but I was also deeply unhappy beforehand. Maybe I have scapegoated this event as the catalyst when really it's something else. Fuck, maybe there wasn't ever really an event but I am just kind of like... off? I have always had some strong emotion issues. Is that ADD... or autism? IDFK. I really don't. 


MAYBE I SHOULD STOP TRYING TO FUCKING FIGURE OUT WHY AND INSTEAD FIGURE OUT HOW I SHOULD HEAL OR NAVIGATE OR WHATEVER. FUCK KAT, HAVE YOU BEEN CHASING THE WRONG THING THIS WHOLE GOD DAMNED TIME?!


AHHHHH



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